So it is getting to that time of the year again when the trees go up, lights fill our streets and windows, it’s s cold and everyone is getting festive and excited for the big day to come. Much like everyone else I LOVE Christmas, I AM OBSESSED. My tree has been up from the 1st of November and I love it, Christmas can never come too quickly- as soon as I am done being a spooky bitch the tinsel comes out and I’m ready for santa. I have been wanting to do a christmas blog for a while and I have been debating what to do it on. My last blog about mental health got some really positive comments and although my main focus is makeup and creative looks I would like to keep up the theme of mental health throughout. I chose to call my blog Beyond Beauty as although i wanted to focus on beauty and makeup i also wanted to include a much deeper side to beauty- the truth to what lies beneath all the makeup and lashes.
So I would like to dedicate this blog to mental health around the Christmas period.
For a lot of people Christmas is a busy time, it’s a time filled with visits to family, shopping, eating, day trips and travelling, however in the mayhem and fun we can sometimes forget to take a moment to look after ourselves and our minds. Christmas for me is all about family and this year is no different, in the past living at home visiting family was never an issue, my mum would have days planned dedicated so certain family members and we’d take day trips to drop of gifts and spend time with these people, although this all changed 3 years ago when I went to university. I chose to study away which was incredible I loved the independence however it meant that come November I had to plan all of my travelling getting flights home, making sure I had enough time there to see everyone and enjoy the holiday before carting myself back to my flat. This was not easy, I think this is the first time i have felt the stress of Christmas and adulthood in general.
As my three years at university continued so did the cycle of stress that surrounded Christmas and the silly thoughts that circled my head, how much time is suitable to spend at home without offending my parents? Do i have to now buy my own gifts for people or will my mum still write from Jasmine at the bottom of the gifts shes bought? Can i ask her that or is that rude? If I have to buy presents where will i get the money? etc. etc. the list goes on. I find that the transition between being a child enjoying Christmas and an adult creating Christmas was so sudden, and it came with no warning labels or advice and this STRESSED me out. I didn’t realise a holiday that was so magical could put so much stress on an individual and I have no kids, what must this holiday be like for parents who have to be ‘Santa’ every year?
I finished university in May just passed, (graduating by the skin of my teeth thanks to Covid) and nothing about Christmas has gotten easier. Since finishing university I have moved in with my boyfriend, we have a gorgeous little flat in the heart of the city which is perfect and the thought of doing Christmas ourselves is so exciting. The only downside to it is that my mum is no longer in charge or decorating, cooking, wrapping or supplying gifts this challenge now falls to me and I am a complete perfectionist which in reality should make things super simple but it doesn’t. Putting our tree up should have been fun and playful, it wasn’t, I had to have every bauble spaced to perfection, no two colours the same could be next to each other, my tinsel is wrapped to perfection. This not only stressed me out but my boyfriend also. Then came gifts, I like to be super prepared and early especially with lockdown coming and going i wanted to make sure I had everything ready, but then came wrapping… STRESSFUL. I am not even thinking about Christmas dinner and the fact I have to cook it, that could lead me to tear my hair out.
Sitting down and reflecting I realised, Christmas is so much work and it’s all for one day, I have been rushing to do things and prepare things perfectly because that’s the way they have always been because my mum has always made them that way. She has always prepared this perfect massive Christmas for our whole family, but now it’s just me and my boyfriend, two of us. We don’t need millions of gifts or a turkey and thousands of trimmings, we don’t need to make Christmas my mothers version of perfect because it should be our version of perfect.
This Christmas is going to be hard because Covid is still very real and a massive issue, it’s gonna make things that extra bit harder to see family and friends, we’re going to struggle to get things we usually have because stock is low and shops are minimal in these hard times. YOU WILL FEEL STRESS.
Have your version of a perfect Christmas. Please don’t spend the holidays looking at the thousands of images posted online by others of their massive overly decorated houses, their massive meals and flashy gifts, don’t stress about not having the money to spend thousands because it is just one day. Christmas is magical- but it can be magical without the decorations and superficial bullshit that surrounds it- all you need is the people you love, a movie or some board games, something to get you altogether, something to get you laughing and something you can keep as a happy memory. The phones and cars won’t last forever- please don’t spend time feeling that what you have isn’t enough- depression and anxiety can creep in so easily without realising, this time of the year especially.
Mental health is something that is constant- the smiles at Christmas you see from others and portray yourself are not always real, please reach out to your friends and family, call, video chat when you can this year is going to be hard for a number of reasons, and loneliness and inadequacy is deadly. Things change quickly and moods come and go please look after yourself take a moment to assess yourself, it is okay to not be okay, please don’t feel like the images and posts you see about joy etc is what the world is feeling this Christmas time- just because it is a joyous time doesn’t mean you have to constantly be happy and hold yourself together. Outer beauty does not reflect inner beauty- take care of each other. Please reach out if you need anything.
Also I feel I have not created as many blogs as i would have liked to by now, and i intended to update my site as frequently as possible from now on, so please expect to see a lot more from me. I am thankful for the support I have received so far as i said at the start if this reaches even just one person then i will feel acomplished. I plan to upload a second blog this week and this will be about my Christmas wishlist showcasing the beauty treats and makeup i will be excited about this year, so please keep an eyeout for this as I am super excited to share it with you. I will also be doing a Christmas page showcasing some of my favourite Christmas looks so keep a look out for that, until then stay safe, lots of love. x
Beyond Beauty 